Quite often around the braai, or dinner table the conversation often turns to ‘Do you remember when?’ It must happen in your homes to – reminiscing about the ‘old days’, or should I say older days, I’m not quite at the stage where I can say ‘the’ old days. You know, “Do you remember Liewe Heksie, or Pumpkin Patch?” or “Remember the old Citi Golf ads, Red, Yellow, Blue?” The other night we were rabbiting on about Speckles and Freckles and “The first tape I bought was….” When someone shouted out “Do you remember Polo’s and Lifesavers?” Now I’m not talking about Polo’s as in VW Polo’s or Lifesavers as in red Speedo’s or scantily clad Pam Anderson, I’m talking about Polo mints and Lifesavers fruity sweets, both made famous by the hole in the center. I piped and said that Lifesavers where called Lifesavers because if you ever choked on one, you wouldn’t choke because of the hole in the center. It could lodge in your gullet, but you’d still be able to breathe. Anyway, nobody believed me; in fact to be honest I think it was a rumor I heard once anyway.

Well, all this talk of Polo sweets got me thinking of VW Polo’s and if it were possible to compare the two it all. Wikipedia says (and yes I realize that Wikepedia has not be subjected to peer review) that the name ‘Polo’ is reportedly from the word ‘Polar’ and is to symbolize the cool and fresh feeling one gets from sucking a Polo. ‘Cool’ and ‘Fresh’? Well that completely trashes the notion of comparing the two. Polo is definitely not cool and it’s not fresh, yes it had a nip and tuck a few years ago with fancy new lights and bumpers, and yes they even made a 1.8 GTi version, like it’s big brother the Golf GTi, but that just made it bi-polar, more ‘Johnny Depp’ than ‘Brad Pitt’.

Some of you may have noticed the sudden bombardment of Polo advertising at the moment, they’re going cheap and there’s good reason for it. There’s a new Polo coming soon to our shores. Now in the market that the Polo competes in, things are hotter than usual, people are skint so they’re buying down, people are skint so they’re not buying up. People in general are skint! This means buyers are making sacrifices and small ‘affordable’ cars are what people want and with the likes of Ford and Mazda taking the fight to rest of market with their class leading ‘2’ and new Fiesta. VW had a real chance to break the mold of the ‘staid, reliable choice’ and really spice things up. Sadly though, It would seem that the Scirocco looks set to be only model keeping the ‘exciting, gorgeous, goose pimples’ flag flying high. Instead VW have brought us a shrunken Golf IV, even more so than the last model. Yes, there are new headlights and a new grill identical to the new Golf and there’s even some funky squared off bumper action going on at the front. But head around to the back and you’ll be disappointed. The current Polo at least gave us some interesting rounded lights that looked ‘Polo mint-ish’’ when lit up, but on the new Polo you just get butterscotch boring, lozenge shaped lights. The flanks are nothing inspiring either with a Mazda 2 or Fiesta in mind. The new Polo just looks slab-sided and boxy.

This isn’t surprising either, considering the Polo is VW highest revenue earner. You wouldn’t expect them to take a jump off the deep end and bring out something head-turning, you see, that might scare off a couple of buyers, and when sales are low like they are now you want a sure bet not an outside chance.

On the plus side, inside the new Polo things are way better than the old model, fit and finish I’m sure will be top drawer and you’ll be assured of soft-touch plastics and class leading ergonomics. Interior space utilization will be improved over the current model; generally cabin ambience will take a further step closer to king-of-the-hill, Audi.

Engine line-up will see the introduction of VW’s acclaimed TSi engine, which incorporates supercharger and turbocharger technology. This engine will most likely be used in the top-spec petrol model and may be used in the forth coming GTi all be it with more power. The current 1.9 TDi engine has been scaled down to 1.6 liters although power output is the same. As per the current trend all the new engines will be significantly greener with lower fuel consumption and CO2 emissions. Expect three door and five door models with options in Trendline, Comfortline and Sportline spec. New to the Polo range will be VW’s seven speed DSG gearbox as seen on other VW models.

Competition in this segment of the market is fierce and the new Polo model will no doubt hold appeal across the board. Resale value and ‘brand snobbery’ will prevail, and soon there’ll be thousands lining the road and if you buy one, you’ll be guaranteed to lose it often at your local mall. Unfortunately quirky and attractive offerings such as the Mazda 2 and Ford Fiesta, not to mention the Fiat Grande Punto, will be over looked.

And in the words of my favourite old school band The Kinks, who said in there song "Low Budget",

"We're all on our uppers, we're all going skint, I used to smoke cigars but now I suck polo mints".